Thursday, April 30, 2009

Like anyone cares, but anyhow...

I don't know when I became antagonistic towards cologne. I used to wear it on evenings out some years back, but in recent years I have found all cologne smell repugnant, sickly. It doesn't matter if it's some expensive and fine one; I hate it when I encounter it passing by other people, from skaters in baggy jeans to men in nice suits. Even in moderate doses.

When I got back in my car this morning after getting gas my right hand was permeated with cologne smell. I don't know if I got it from the gas pump handle, from the cash machine buttons or the cash I got back from the cashier, but it stank of some stupid synthetic substance probably advertised as attractive to the opposite sex.

Which is part of why it I think it's repugnant: it's synthetic - and when that mingles with the real smell of porous skin, it makes for an ugly result. Like, what are you trying to mask? Does cologne merely act as a carrier of one's normal smell, and perversely make it worse? I remember this eccentric old lady; really a great old lady, but she wore this lipstick...oh, it was so bad.

I notice how no manufactured cologne or perfume can really copy real smells, like lilac bloom or even common mint. And even the the most expensive cologne becomes stale on the wearer. Even ones that are supposed to be light or non-oppressive are oppressive and heavy.

I find even most deodorants are sickly. Oceanwindmountainspice or whatever compound the deodorant uses, I find is a guarantee that it is sickly.

Yes, it's non-scented - or the next best thing to it - for me, without anti-perspirant. Actually, since I ran out of deodorant about a two months ago, I haven't bought any yet. I haven't noticed much of any difference at all. Of course, I don't live in a tropical jungle, nor refuse to take showers, so I'm probably not the best person to advocate using less deodorant (I'm not saying stop).

Oh, and fruity smelling shampoo...ugh - or any shampoo that tries to manufacture a smell other than regular soapy shampoo - it's gross.

And don't get me started on toothpaste. When I brush my teeth I want good plain cleaning; the almost searing quality of unapologetic mint, unsweetened; I don't want freaking candy in gel form.

Stupid, stupid companies. Stupid, stupid us.


ukok said...

It's because we are indoctrinated to believe all the crud of the media 'show and tell'.

Personally, i think it's sad that we have to disguise our true selves with fake hair colour and anti-wrinkle creams....disguise the natural (clean) scent of ourselves because we think we will not be 'attractive' to others, particulalry members of the opposite sex.

I think we all think too much about what other people think of us. I'm trying to opt out of that lie that it matters at all.

But nail polish i like.

Anonymous said...

What about Old Spice?

Bryan <><

Paul Stilwell said...

ukok, I agree very much. We've been duped into believing that if we don't buy their products (and the philosophy that goes with them) we are suddenly on the other end of the spectrum: offensive, smelly, wrinkled and crude. Unbelievable. What loneliness the wholly initiated must endure, unable to be alone with their true interior self...probably a lot of loneliness.

Bryan, Old Spice be damned - at least with periodic probations.

Anonymous said...

The worst is the elderly ladies that pour it on by the bucket. For me the headache's usually immediate. Seriously, do they not know?

Bryan <><